online dating – your contract details, please

An article on a US review site recently reported how akin finding a romantic interest online is to searching for a job. Unlike much of the keyword-stuffed tripe that Google chooses to partner with when you subscribe to its feeds and alerts service for online dating and UK dating (so much for its zero-tolerance black hat policy), this article was insightful, well-written and contained some interesting comparisons.

Tailored to the US market, this report highlights the similarities between the constant search for love online and also how alike the backdrop to our respective societies have become. Not only in our attitudes to finding prospective partners online but also the plight of each country’s millions who are struggling to juggle the dole queue with finding a love life, as we approach one of the most romantic times of the year.

What do you do – carry on with your dating site’s subscription fee only to find a love online but be unable to buy them a present for Christmas? Should we be having to sacrifice our search for love for the next meal, as unemployment levels rise?

Well, let’s take a look at the points made in the article, then I’ll add my last point which, as a married person, a single person would may be miss.

your online dating curriculum vitae

Okay, first and foremost is the image you’re trying to portray. It has to ring true with the real you, but you still have license to tweak that image to your target audience. For example, if you are trying to work your way up the ladder, which is true in most cases when submitting your CV, successful candidates tailor their persona to the job requirements. If you have a specific ‘type’ of person you are looking to attract on your dating site, modify your profile to your best guess at what that type will be looking for in a partner.

The words – as important as your image. When running through CV’s, especially on agency databases, matches will come up based on the job requirement and what you have included in your résumé. Dating sites, especially matchmaking sites, use similar algorithms to pair couples from their vast dating site databases.

Clichés are not good. Whether you’re looking for a job or a partner, you have to exhibit an element of your personality that will make you stand out from the crowd. How many profiles do you think dating site voyeurs look through before they hit on one, someone they’ve never met, and feel confident or impressed enough to risk approaching them? Recruiters are the same. Their reputation is at stake and must deliver quality over and above anything that the competition fields, to enhance their chances of repeat business, or a second date, in comparison.

The point that the guy from the US missed? The long-term contract.

If you’re in it for the long haul, you will stand a much better chance of succeeding if your abilities, preferences, ambitions and goals are laid out bare from the outset. Once you sign on that dotted line, there’s no point in complaining about specifics later on that didn’t form part of the contract that you don’t like now. It’s your job, your partner, for better or for worse.

Dating in the noose as hanging is in

As reported earlier in the week, my nineteen year old step son has an aversion to dating. Not hat he has anything against women, and neither is he into men, but uncovering a romantic interest from his circle of friends, which is split more or less fifty-fifty male and female, is simply not on the cards.

There is plenty of documentary evidence on the internet to tell me that he is not on his own and this phenomenon is all too commonplace with ‘Generation Y’.

Online dating, once the provenance of the young and chic, has seen its most prominent increase in usage by those aged fifty-five plus in recent times, swiftly followed by the forty-five to fifty-four age group. Other than a true ‘matchmaking’ site, which takes ones characteristics, runs psychometric tests and analyses all other types of conundrums to pair couples, there is little to be gleaned from other types of online dating sites that you cannot get from other avenues of free social media.

The conclusion from this is, whereas in the past it would take weeks of seeing someone to get to know them by arranging dates with just the two of you outside your circle of friends, you can log onto their home page and discover everything instantly. The intrigue and mystique has all but gone, as you already have an opinion of a new friend before you have ever clapped eyes on them.

commitment is still a four-letter word

With such an array of talent available at the click of a mouse, flicking from one dating profile to the next, dropping PM’s or ‘crushing’ as many people who you think you may like on a dating site, the options are countless. What one dating site member has that a media socialite hasn’t can tempt you to leave as many doors of opportunity ajar as possible. Thus, the ‘C’ word, in this case ‘commitment’, never, ever gets a look in.

Even if two consenting young adults from the same group of friends do date, there is no longer the ‘taking sides’ when it all goes pear-shaped and the gang just returns to how it was before the ill-fated encounter. How times have changed! The retribution for letting ‘one of our down’ back in the day could last for weeks, if not permanently.

Industry, too, has backed this sentiment of lack of commitment from the younger generation up. However, it is job agencies and not online dating agencies who have taken the wrap in this instance.

Under recent financial constraints, the growth of the job agency has been unprecedented, with firms taking on staff on an ‘as needed’ basis. This has created something of a monster, as youngsters, now, are getting used to short-term stints with any one employer. With an emphasis returning to three and four year apprenticeships for school-leavers, we wish them luck, there.

What this will accomplish for the institute of marriage in years to come? Well, with fewer ‘Generation Y’ adults going on to get married, at least the divorce rate may eventually see a reversal in trend.