You know you’re not doing your dating, but who is?

We have written to some extent about the value of paying for paid dating site services on dating.org.uk/ for some time. The one role that we’ve not significantly considered is that played out by the actual relationship expert.

A recent report by one self-styled matchmaking guru claims to have been present at a session for such practitioners to find that they were the only one present who had any relevant experience in the field, let alone any sort of certification to exonerate the fact that they were qualified thus to perform what was asked of them.

If you are a straight male who is genuinely hard pressed for time, earning enough in a month to feed a small African village for twice as long, do you really want a gay graduate or ageing professor deciding who is your best prospect in the online dating community? What say do you get, as the venerable dating site member, in deciding who takes on your case, other than at the point of sign-up for whichever of the growing number of ‘high-end’ online dating facilities you opt for?

Money talks and those who feel empowered enough by their sizeable income to allow someone else to do their matchmaking for them would, you’d think, move in circles where they expect only the best service for their outlay.  From having a personal assistant who knows how to get the coffee just so (amongst their other duties, obviously) to only buying from clothes shops that get the fit ‘just so’, service is almost expected and only noticed when it’s sub-standard.  Is this message getting through to the top niche of the dating world, delivering a service second to none or are they leaving their clients hanging on because, let’s face it, their can only be so big a market for entrepreneurs willing to part with such commanding monthly fees?

If the recent report is true, those gathered at the recent council of relationship experts included those who done their dating training before the Internet was a force to be reckoned with, was littered with people who had a same-sex orientation and even those who took on the role of cupid only on a part-time basis to fund their passage through college.

In a deviation from our usual path, over the next two days, we will unearth the secrets behind who’s doing your matchmaking for you and once again pose the question: is anyone really suited to find your perfect partner other than you? Look forward to your company.

Aussie rules speed dating

Perth, Australia, not Scotland, has seen an unprecedented rise in speed dating gatherings, for all ages and backgrounds. To give the UK dating membership an insight into their protocol, here’s an overview of the down under view of speed dating, following on from our article, ‘Speed dating down under – well, to catch a kangaroo…’

Firstly, for many of these type of super speed dating gatherings, you have to register. It’s become that popular in Perth, that they hold sessions for different ages and varying experience, either gained or wanted. So, if you’re looking to date a farmhand in his early thirties, don’t turn up to a post-graduates event for the early twenties! Most speed dating centres do have an online dating presence, so book in advance for the event you want to attend.

Secondly, most speed dating hosts welcome you with a drop of the old amber nectar or Jacob’s Creek, just to settle you down – some even advertise the night as with ‘free-flowing champagne’, but not all serve alcohol. So if it’s essential, this Dutch courage, do have one before hand, but you do not want to approach anyone whilst you’re totally under the influence; here’s why:-

Once you get started, keep your objective in mind. Try to rehearse the questions in your head before you arrive and any possible answers to their questions that may be thrown your way by your target audience (a lot of the better speed dating organisations have a decent enough FAQ section to help you stand out from the crowd – well worth a peep to get the upper hand on the competition!). You may only have seven or ten minutes to make an impression and get the relevant information from the potential partner sitting opposite you – make every second count.

Once you have been through the field – not in the Biblical sense, mind, just the speed dating bit – do step back and think about it before you plunge in, but not too long! If there is only one beefcake or princess there, everyone will be gathering like flies around bees around honey. Try and pick out those who you may want to hone in on whilst you’re at the beverage stage, so that you can anticipate who’s left, enabling you to cut down the field as you approach the final one or two candidates.

This is why you must leave the beer goggles at home – everyone will seem fanciable after one too many and you’ll just go bounding from one to the next at the end, becoming more desperate after each rejection, putting off anyone who may be genuinely interested in dating you.

If your dating site doesn’t do it for you, or if you genuinely do not have the inclination to go speed dating, choose from our hand picked dating sites, to find your perfect partner in minutes.

Speed dating down under – well, to catch a kangaroo…

It’s great having an online dating relationship but, let’s face it, that’s getting you no actual action, whatsoever. There comes a time when you have to take that leap of faith and actually go and meet someone, especially if you’re paying a monthly subscription, otherwise, well, you may as well just donate that money to chastity charity.

In Australia, namely Perth, they seem to have this concept of dating sussed – the offline type, not the online. The city has seen an unprecedented rise in the number of speed dating events, recently, and they’re becoming ever more popular.

Typically of Australians, there’s no beating about the bush (the size of the Australian bush [hey, careful!], it’s no wonder]). If you’re sitting there looking at your online dating site but worried that you wouldn’t be able to support a conversation for a whole evening with any one of a whole number of singles who look as if they’re in your target bracket, based on age, income, background, education, etc., then why not try a speed dating event local to you?

You’re not expected to talk very long and if the person you’re interested in is just not into you, there’s no hanging about for days wondering if they’re ever going to get in touch via a private message or e-mail from your dating site. If they are, however, keen and you meet no one better and neither do they (than you, obviously, not themselves), then bingo, dingo! – you can be on your way before the clock strikes one and, at last, you can get that bit of dating action, which has been sorely missing from your life.

To give you an insight a little more about what an event like this entails, bearing in mind this is Australian rules – if you’ve ever watched Aussie rules football compared to the Premier League poseurs, you’ll know how vast a difference there is between us and our Antipodean cousins – we’ll give you an overview in our next article, ‘Aussie rules speed dating’.  So, keeping an open mind being very much the order of the day, we’ll see you there.