Is it our dating profile ageing or has the mirror cracked?

There is a very real difference between what dating site owners perceive their users’ experience of their facility is and what the dating site member actually gets from the service. This is personified by a blog I read earlier that backs up something we wrote about here on only last week, but sheds a little more light on the matter. Today’s other post will back this up further, too.

Earlier this week we reported that nine out of ten people lie on their dating site profile. And that one in ten profiles are made up. Now that figure assumed that the ten percent were sickos, wierdos or perverts. However, having seen evidence today to the contrary, it seems that people are creating multiple profiles purely to extend the net of who they can attract if their existing personals are starting to seem a bit dowdy and not attracting as many hits, messages or coming up in the ‘popular’ search results as often as they did when the dating site member first joined the site.

Now, what does this do to the numbers of members that dating sites claim to have? What makes the story worse for the blogger in question who’d contemplated setting up a second account was that she was already in a relationship with someone she’d met online. By her own admission, she’d been away from the dating site for six months and hadn’t been hit upon as much recently since she stopped using the facility on a regular basis. It seems that, for vanity’s sake only, she was now going to create another persona.

There was no suggestion that she and ‘Banjo Boy’ had stopped dating, just that she liked popping back for a ‘quickie’ but had got the impression that her profile had reached an expiry date. The complex had been brought on by the fact that she’d sent four first messages (an art in which she was prolific, if her self-appraisal is accurate) to singles with PhD’s and none of them had replied. Was she punching above her weight or, by her own admission, were they just not interested in being hunted by the cougar?

Is it right to create another profile just because you want a little more attention than your real information is attracting? Or should she, as another dating site regular commenting on her blog suggested she’d done recently, re-write her profile to reflect her current circumstances, throw out all the old pictures, refresh the words and the photos? Although, it has to be said, she’s not on her own in this; profile photos is one area that both men and women fail at on dating sites. The fairer sex tend to be the worse of the two, using a profile photo eighteen months old and mens a mere six months in comparison, according to one recent survey.

The concluding question was along the line of: “has anyone experienced a similar profile ageing process?” I don’t think it’s the dating site profile that’s got the issue with ageing, do you?

Less flack nowadays as cougar styles move in one direction

When Doctor Foster happened upon Gloucester in the middle of the nineteenth century, never to return again, it wasn’t perhaps the fact that he stepped in the piddle up to his middle that stopped him returning. More likely, if the women way back then were anything like the city’s present female population, it was the fact that he was being hunted by cougars that made him uneasy about going back.

This is what the results of a recent survey, show: Gloucester has more cougars than anywhere else in the country, with 7 out of 10 women actively considering dating younger men. Of those, 12 per cent are actively on the prowl, looking to get their claws stuck in to a strip of younger flesh for nothing more than a passing liaison.

Quite surprisingly, that figure is not excessively higher than the national average, with just over half of the women on singles network Badoo who took part in the online questionnaire conceding they had seriously considered picking up toyboys at one time or another.

The dating site polled 2,000 UK women to find out which city was the country’s cougar capital, with Gloucester having one in ten more women likely to pounce on a young buck than its closest rivals. Both cities completing the top three in the adult dating survey were north of the border, with Aberdeen registering 62% of its women looking for a highland fling with a younger man and Scotland’s second city, Glasgow, finishing in third, with 61% of its females pining for younger Gorbals looking to sow their oats.

As recently reported here on, although fashionable, this type of relationship can soon get fraught. Demi Moore’s relationship with Ashton Kutcher, 16 years her junior, lasted a fleeting six years after they made it down the aisle. Madonna and Guy Ritchie promised so much, both at the pinnacle of their professions, but lasted such a short time.

Of course, the current flavour of the month is media presenter Caroline Flack, dating X-Factor wannabe Harry Styles from the group One Direction, made popular by money-magnate Simon Cowell’s show. At 32, Caroline is taking the cougar theme to the extreme by dating the 17-year old, who would still be at school, albeit sixth form, if it wasn’t for the ‘fame’ bestowed by the popular update of New Faces.

Will this one go the distance? I’d bet him a pint that it won’t, but he’s not yet old enough to buy it me when I win…