As reported earlier in the week, my nineteen year old step son has an aversion to dating. Not hat he has anything against women, and neither is he into men, but uncovering a romantic interest from his circle of friends, which is split more or less fifty-fifty male and female, is simply not on the cards.
There is plenty of documentary evidence on the internet to tell me that he is not on his own and this phenomenon is all too commonplace with ‘Generation Y’.
Online dating, once the provenance of the young and chic, has seen its most prominent increase in usage by those aged fifty-five plus in recent times, swiftly followed by the forty-five to fifty-four age group. Other than a true ‘matchmaking’ site, which takes ones characteristics, runs psychometric tests and analyses all other types of conundrums to pair couples, there is little to be gleaned from other types of online dating sites that you cannot get from other avenues of free social media.
The conclusion from this is, whereas in the past it would take weeks of seeing someone to get to know them by arranging dates with just the two of you outside your circle of friends, you can log onto their home page and discover everything instantly. The intrigue and mystique has all but gone, as you already have an opinion of a new friend before you have ever clapped eyes on them.
commitment is still a four-letter word
With such an array of talent available at the click of a mouse, flicking from one dating profile to the next, dropping PM’s or ‘crushing’ as many people who you think you may like on a dating site, the options are countless. What one dating site member has that a media socialite hasn’t can tempt you to leave as many doors of opportunity ajar as possible. Thus, the ‘C’ word, in this case ‘commitment’, never, ever gets a look in.
Even if two consenting young adults from the same group of friends do date, there is no longer the ‘taking sides’ when it all goes pear-shaped and the gang just returns to how it was before the ill-fated encounter. How times have changed! The retribution for letting ‘one of our down’ back in the day could last for weeks, if not permanently.
Industry, too, has backed this sentiment of lack of commitment from the younger generation up. However, it is job agencies and not online dating agencies who have taken the wrap in this instance.
Under recent financial constraints, the growth of the job agency has been unprecedented, with firms taking on staff on an ‘as needed’ basis. This has created something of a monster, as youngsters, now, are getting used to short-term stints with any one employer. With an emphasis returning to three and four year apprenticeships for school-leavers, we wish them luck, there.
What this will accomplish for the institute of marriage in years to come? Well, with fewer ‘Generation Y’ adults going on to get married, at least the divorce rate may eventually see a reversal in trend.